“Band of Brothers” Writer Tackles Love Across the Political Divide in New Film – Erik Bork

Airdate: August 20, 2025

Julie Rose: Would you be comfortable dating — or having your kid date — someone from the other political party?

Erik Bork: People in media and politics are incentivized to be polarized and to keep us polarized, but real people in your life are probably a lot more complicated, a lot more nuanced, and probably have a lot more in common.

Julie Rose: Hey, it's Julie. Welcome to Uncomfy, a show about sticking with moments that challenge us even when they're uncomfortable. And I know you're probably wondering, "Why would anybody choose to be uncomfortable?" But I know from personal experience, and you probably do too, that sometimes a little bit of discomfort has benefits if we can stay open and curious about it. And that's what we're here to explore, so let's get Uncomfy. 60% of Americans under the age of 30 said in a recent national poll that it's important to date or marry someone who shares your political views. So, that is the core tension in a new romantic comedy that is really unlike any I've ever watched. Here's a quick clip from the trailer.

Leah: Well, you're making me sound kind of awesome.

Vincent: You're also pretty one track minded. I don't know if a single person in my restaurant voted Republican.

Leah: Except for you?

Vincent: Yeah.

Leah: Oh, okay.

Vincent: Why are you going on a date with him if you're so concerned about such political beliefs?

Leah: I'm conflicted. He's very sweet.

Julie Rose: The film is called "The Elephant in the Room." It was written, directed, and produced by Erik Bork, who's actually best known for writing and producing the HBO miniseries, "Band of Brothers." Erik Bork, welcome to Uncomfy.

Erik Bork: Thanks so much for having me, Julie. I'm excited to be here.

Julie Rose: As I mentioned, I really enjoyed this film. It was a really fun take on the rom-com tropes, right? Uh, I'm curious if this was inspired in any way by real life for you, a cross-partisan relationship of your own that you've either watched play out or you've experienced?

Erik Bork: Yeah, a little bit. I mean, I,I started thinking of the idea in, around, around 2016 election, you know, which made a lot of people go, "Wow, this is not what we expected," um, and I, you know, I'm a screenwriter who've written, who's written many movies, you know, most of them never produce, but, you know, a lot of scripts and quite a few rom-coms, and I've always, you know, recognized that the thing you needed in a rom-com is the reason why they can't be together. You know, so, like, finding that reason is the hook of the movie, and so, at a certain point, I was like, "In our current age, politics could be that thing. Like, maybe not so much 20 years ago, but now for sure." So, uh, around the time that, um, President Trump got elected the first time, I definitely came from the, from the liberal side of the spectrum, and I was, I was pretty shocked by that, and a good friend of mine, we were driving in his car, and I assumed that he was on the same side, and, and I was just, like, ranting a little bit maybe, I don't know, about Trump, I don't remember. And I was like, "Do you, do you know anybody who's, like, a supporter, uh, uh, like, who voted for him or whatever?" And he was like, "Well, actually, I did." And he was, I think, a little afraid to admit that because the circles we were in, you know, very LA sort of like, I don't know, culturally, whatever you wanna call circle, working in media, he also worked in the Hollywood world, you know, I think he was probably afraid of being judged for that. Um, so isn't something, and wasn't super public and vocal about it amongst the people more on the left that was our circle. But I, you know, engaged him about it and asked questions, and our friendship remained, it's got even stronger probably. And he, he had been a liberal before, um, and he told me the reasons why, and, and he was a complicated guy who was not everything that somebody who's on the, like, "echo-chamber left" might assume a Trump voter is, um, and that partly informed what ended up being the character in this film who is the, the Trump voter that the progressive female meets and is shocked to learn about his politics.

Julie Rose: It's interesting that you say your, your friendship's actually gotten stronger despite your political differences. Um, how? Like, why do you think that's happened?

Erik Bork: Well, I mean, we actually don't talk anymore, like, it, I mean, we, we live in different places, and our lives have moved on. It was sort of a, of a, a, a friendship for a season. But when it was happening, I think it got stronger for a time because, I don't know, because he was able to talk openly, probably, with somebody who wasn't judging him for his views and who wanted to understand. Um, and so there, you know, a greater intimacy comes out of that, I suppose.

Julie Rose: Why do you think you were interested in learning? I mean, was it difficult for you to kind of conjure curiosity for your friend's perspective? That's one of the tensions we see in this film where Leah, who's the, the girl and she's more progressive, well, she's definitely progressive and kind of appalled that Vincent, the guy, has voted for Trump, and uh, it's hard for her to muster, like, any, any curiosity. I'll play a clip in a moment that kind of, kind of teases at that, but was it challenging for you to, to be curious even about this other perspective?

Erik Bork: It actually wasn't that challenging for me for a few reasons. One was when Trump got elected, I really felt that polarization was part of the reason why that happened, and I became more interested in polarization as an issue almost than the fact that Trump was president. So, I was starting to really recognize that maybe I was in a bit of an echo chamber myself — the shows that I would watch, the news I, the media I would consume, whether it was comedy or straight news or commentary on the news. And so, I, I wanted to understand why this could happen, I wanted to get out of an echo chamber if I was in one, and also, as a writer, it's kind of your job to, like, understand different points of view, and I think my personality is geared toward that anyway. Like, when my wife will tell me what somebody said that she didn't like, I'll immediately try and understand what that person might be thinking, which isn't helpful at all when your, when your wife wants you to say, you know, just take her side completely. So I'm already. I think wired to wanna like get inside and understand those other points of view, I think.

Julie Rose: What was challenging for you then about channeling or writing these two characters, um, 'cause, you know, the risk is always to lean into stereotypes, right?

Erik Bork: Right, and, well, I mean, I think the challenge was more in writing his character because even though I had this one friend, you know, it's a fictional character, although he does borrow a few beliefs or traits from my friend, but he was also a, a, a made up character and, you know, I didn't understand how he thought really. I mean, I could hear my friend say, "This is the policy positions I like," but, but trying to create a character that I could fully imagine as real, who had certain views or beliefs that I didn't share, you know, I, it wasn't as easy as writing her character or writing the other character who's also more on the left. And I was lucky that I had the help of these nonprofits that helped fund the film who care about bridging, uh, bridging divides, and they actually were willing to read the script and give advice on how to make both characters be both dimensional, believable, and sympathetic, regardless of which side you were on, which is really important because in a romantic comedy, you kind of have to like, or even love both people and want them to be together, uh, even if you disagree with somebody's politics or personality or whatever.

Julie Rose: But you, but were you thinking in, what, what's something that you would've, that you changed or you toned down or you added to Vincent's character as a result?

Erik Bork: Well, I mean, one of the big things was I softened him quite a bit in terms of how hardcore he was, and I created this grandmother character who's the more hardcore one, and he's a little less hardcore. So, in very early drafts of the script, he wanted to go to the rally on January 6th himself and check it out and then he got a bit disillusioned by being there, uh, and some of these bridging group people said, "You know, if he actually goes and physically attends, it might be hard for people on the left to accept her giving him any kind of a chance after that," which I hadn't even thought of that, even though I'm coming from the left. I'm always looking for conflict and things that will make it as hard as possible that then you have to solve that in the script, so, but I took that on, and I also was like, "Yeah, it's gonna be hard for people more on the left to want potentially her to give him any, uh, you know, any time, any opportunity," so I became convinced having him not go and be skeptical about going was gonna be better for that reason.

Julie Rose: I thought it was interesting that, uh, that the character Vincent, the, the Trump voter, um, seems a lot more kind of just like, "It's fine. We're different. It's okay. Let's, like, you know, we have chemistry," and, and she, uh, was the one that was like, "This, just, I can't get over it, and I can't," you know, and she grappled. We see, granted the film takes, most of it takes place kind of from, like, within her world, and we're seeing kind of her, so we see her doing the wrestling. Was that an intentional choice, though? I mean, do, have you found in your life that Trump voters, conservatives tend to be, I don't know, more "tolerant" maybe isn't quite the right word, but did you make that intentional choice that he would be a little less worried about this real difference of ideology that they had?

Erik Bork: Oh, big time. Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I, I can't say that I, that I know that that's true about Trump voters necessarily or that I have a big enough sample size to say that at all, but I definitely knew people on the, on the left side who were really locked down about it the way she is, and I maybe made her that, a version of that, more locked down than I am, let's say, in terms of, "This is a complete deal breaker, and I don't know anybody who thinks that way, and I can't imagine how anyone would think that way," et cetera. And so, like, he's more of a bridging person. Like, he's willing to hear the other side and be affected by it, and so even though the movie's more from her point of view, and I think naturally as the audience, you tend to be more... not on her side, but, but because you're seeing it more through her perspective, unless you just hate her politics or hate her personality so much, you're gonna tend to side with her or at least be, like, relating to her and what she's going through, but I gave him a arguably more appealing quality in terms of the openness. So, one of the other things that happens in the movie that people have asked about is like, not to give away the ending, but, like, she has some impact on his views, he doesn't really have any impact on her views, and people said, "Well, is that fair? Is that balanced? Is that right?" And my view is that he has an impact on her personally, uh, because he gets her to, you know, consider someone from these opposite views in a more human, nuanced way, um, which is arguably a bigger change than him potentially changing his view on a particular issue. I won't give away all the details of that.

Julie Rose: Yeah. You know, I, um, I, I wanna talk, tell you about the part that I found, like, most surprising and really kind of had me kind of chewing on the whole, this whole concept in the film. And that is that, let me just play a clip here, first of all. So, this is one of the very early dates that they're having, and Leah has invited him over for pizza, I think, and, this is what happens.

Leah: Just talking about politics is so triggering.

Vincent: You know what, I don't, I don't need to.

Leah: I'm curious. I'm terrified of your answers, but I, I feel like I have to ask, what do you like about him?

Julie Rose: So, here, here's what was interesting to me about that moment and then kind of what unspool is that, and I don't wanna give too much away, but they go ahead and have the conversation. He's kind of like, "Ah, you know, we can talk about other, let's talk about the weather. I don't know, let's talk about sports, something." And she's like, "No, I feel like I really gotta scratch this itch." And then I was prepared for this, like, they were gonna be brave and have the Uncomfy conversation and come to a common understanding, and it does not go that way at all for these two. So, just talk to me about that, about the decision to sort of require that they go there as opposed to making this a film about two people who realize they have lots of other common interests and they can set their politics aside.

Erik Bork: Well, just from a screenwriting point of view, from a dramatist point of view, it's like, "You always lean into the conflict." The conflict is the movie, right? So, you, the whole premise of the movie is, "That's in the way of a relationship. What's gonna happen?" So, you can't solve the conflict or the movie ends. People get bored when people are just getting along and chitchatting in a positive way or falling in love. It's boring to watch people fall in love as an audience. It's fun to watch people struggle with a love that is forbidden or impossible, but yet they still want it, right? So, just from that standpoint, I had to keep the political thing be in the way all the way through and evolve and even escalate over time, uh, just from my training as how, like, story works.

Julie Rose: I mean, did you feel the urge, though, to wanna sort of, because, like, I've read a lot of bridge building material. Like, I want to believe that having these Uncomfy conversations can actually lead to some, something besides just more arguments, right?

Erik Bork: Well, I think it's hard because if, if you, if your standpoint is that the other person is wrong in a way that's evil and hurting people, so it's a moral issue, not just a political disagreement, you feel like you're supporting something evil if you, you know, if you, uh, align yourself with them. And I don't know if both sides see the other side equally in that regard, but I do think there's this sense of, "The other side is so wrong, and it's so evil, basically, that it's beyond political, it's moral," so that's, that's what makes it difficult. But I think, you know, research on polarization has shown that people always overestimate how extreme people on the other side are and how in agreement they are with all the things that the most polarized figures in the media and politics, you know, talk about. So, people in media and politics are incentivized to be polarized and to keep us polarized, I believe, then that means thinking about the other side in the worst possible way and thinking that you, "There is a side, and you're on opposite sides," and it really does feel that way based on consuming media and politics, but real people in your life are probably a lot more complicated, a lot more nuanced, and probably have a lot more in common if you were able to have constructive dialogue, but we're not in a situation right now where that seems to be the, the default.

Julie Rose: So, were you hoping to model some of that with this film? Like, what is it that you hope people will take away?

Erik Bork: Yeah, I mean, look, first and foremost, I just wanted to write a funny, endearing, compelling romantic comedy about these three people, 'cause there's a third character who's very important as well who's kind of in the middle in a way, her housemate, and her relationship with him is a big part of the movie, too, not just,

Julie Rose: and he's the best. I'll just, I'll just call out. I, I loved him, his hilarious, um, role in The Good Place, the TV show, and he, he is, he, he is, like, really, actually every time he's on screen, I was always really kind of captivated, so that was a great choice, and it does add a lot of, um, kind of nuance to her, her character, especially.

Erik Bork: And a lot of the humor comes from him, too, and, and their relationship. So, you know, first and foremost, I just wanted to write a movie that worked in that way and that, and that was, like, an interesting, current, topical thing that wasn't necessarily trying to, like, get people to change in some very specific way. I don't think the movie has a message of, certainly doesn't have a message that one side of politics is right or wrong. I try to depict it fairly, I don't know if I fully succeeded, but I try to depict both sides without putting my thumb on the scale of, "This is obviously the side that is right," or anything like that. Obviously, I believe that polarization is an issue, so that was an inspiring thing, but it's not like I can say, "Well, people after they watch this movie should go call somebody and have a con-" I mean, whatever. Like, I'm not, I'm not that self important about it that I think, "This is a call to action that people have to do something," but I guess in my fantasy, people would look at it and it would make them think in a slightly different new way about that issue and how it affects their own life and maybe, um, maybe it does inspire something that's positive and that's loving and that's open and that's about self-examination and willingness to see good in others in a way that maybe people aren't tending to do as much right now.

Julie Rose: Yeah. Well, Erik Bork, I wish you a lot of luck. It's such a fun film. The film is called "The Elephant in the Room," You can watch it now on all of the places online where you can rent films — Apple, Prime, Google Play, you name it — or you can learn more at elephantintheroomfilm.com. Thanks so much for taking time.

Erik Bork: Thanks so much for having me, Julie. Really appreciate it.

Julie Rose: And thank you for getting Uncomfy with us today. How are you handling political differences in your friendships, your relationships? Are you in a mixed marriage of political ideology? I'd love to hear how that's working out for you. Email uncomfy@byu.edu or connect with us on social media, we are uncomfy.podcast on Instagram. Let's keep this conversation going. Uncomfy is a BYUradio podcast. Samuel Benson produces it, and the team includes Hyobin Kim and Sam Payne. Our theme music was composed by Kelsey Nay. I'm Julie Rose. Can't wait to get Uncomfy with you again next week.​